Thursday, March 6, 2014

Jesus was born in Ireland

My parents had another daughter, Angela. If you remember in an earlier blog I talked about how we lived in a "home" dubbed "Family Care" where all the teaching books and curriculum's, to home school the children in our cult, were created. The reason we made our own was to be sure everything learned was approved by our leader David Berg. We were kept separate from all other members of the group and were also fully supported. We had to move around a lot because our leadership were paranoid that the local authorities might be looking for us.

Our home was moved to Ireland. I remember the backyard was full of thorn bushes that I loved to hide in while playing "Tag" because no one was brave enough to deal with a few scratches and come get me. I remember Ireland was so green, florescent green rolling hills, deep green forests, and one of the first things we did was explore an old fort with canons pointing out to sea.

There were also some way cool neighbor kids that told me Jesus was born in Ireland, when I called them on their outrageous lie, they swore they could prove it to me be showing me the town of Bethlehem and the stable where he was born. So off I went, I was 4 by now, tearing off into the woods with a group of boys all taking turns holding my hand and pulling me along behind them. I know, dumb kid! We finally made it to a clearing with 3 dilapidated old farm buildings where a small sign proclaimed I was indeed in "Betlam. Jesus borned here" Learn something new everyday.

These same neighbor boys helped me carefully place cow manure into a tin pan, cover it with whipped cream, and pass a nice big healthy slice of a pretty convincing looking pie (I thought) to my poor mother....who I'm sure knew what I was up to the whole time...but she looked me straight in the eye as she slowly raised the spoon full of yuck to her mouth and I broke down, confessing all. Wow did I get a monster spanking.

Ireland is where both my sisters got mumps and so did the other kids in our home, so my parents made me sleep and play with them in the sick room....but I never got sick. I don't know if you've heard of this, but it seems it's much better for a child to catch things like mumps, chicken pox, etc. then an adult. Mom tried to help this process along by making me hang out with the sick kids, but besides the whooping cough when I was a baby, I never got another childhood disease. I think its my super power!!!

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